their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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