i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My life is pants optional.
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