and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
We're too hungover to prance.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
