areolas are like halos for boobs.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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