lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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