4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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