Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
