OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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