I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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