At least make sure they are 18
Why
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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