The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
