Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Randomize