I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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