thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
