you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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