Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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