Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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