It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Church boner. Awkwardddd
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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