idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
