so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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