Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
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Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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