having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
