Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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