Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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