when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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