So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
