i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So squirting runs in the family.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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