Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
