The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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