i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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