exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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