Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
