I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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