Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize