Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I will be naked everywhere
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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