The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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