the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize