The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is