I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
