Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
