All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
