Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Randomize
