Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
