Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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