the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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