i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
