I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Randomize
