guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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