Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
