margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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