it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
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At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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